


The Most Cheerful Are The Saddest

by IAmSoSadICantCry



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, I love sunshine boy I swear, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, WARNING: I AM NOT A GOOD WRITER, im so sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-19
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-02-16 20:37:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13061700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IAmSoSadICantCry/pseuds/IAmSoSadICantCry
Summary: A Chariot is strong, it will hold warriors or mighty royalty without discrimination, but it can break and hurt others as well, hurting itself in the process.And no won can predict when it will break.(spooky)





	1. The seams split

**Author's Note:**

> first fan fiction is a angsty mess. I am so sorry. I tried. o(TヘTo)

Akira couldn’t sleep.

He was tired from the big day he had, defeating shido, escaping the exploding palace, and the food he ate made him want to fall into a food coma, sure, but something was nagging at him, even when he was trying to sleep. 

It was Ryuji.

After Ryuji saved them, the girls beat him up, and Akira thought Ryuji deserved it; until he thought more about it later that night, leading to now. 

Ryuji had saved them, risking his life, but Akira and everyone else in the team found joy in beating him after that. Not just that, but insulting him and ignoring him afterwords.

He did worry them though, so that’s a reason, right? It was justified, _right?_

The raven was taken out of his thoughts by his phone chiming it’s cheery ringtone.

“Ugh, who would call you at this hour?” Morgana complained. Akira rolled his eyes and opened his phone, adjusting to the light for a second, reading the address.

_I don’t now this contact, who is calling me?_

Akira hit the answer button, and put it up to his ear.

“H-hello? Is th-this Akira Kuru-s-su?” A small, sobbing voice came through the speaker. “Yes, it’s me. Who is this?” He said nervously, not bothering to hide his confusion. How did they know him?

“O-o-oh, we-well. I got it off Ryuji’s phone.” The voice responded, sounding like they were trying to stop crying. “I’m Hana Sa-Sakamoto, r-ryuji’s aunt. His mo-mom told me to call you.” She stopped for a moment, seemingly to prepare herself. The raven used it to try and prepare himself as well.  
“Ryuji is in the hospital.” She spat out quickly. “Please come. Where in the local hospital. I think his friends should know what happened.” She then hung up.

Akira’s eyes were wide, even as he took his phone away from his ear. What happened to Ryuji?

Oh.

_Oh. Maybe Ryuji was hurt from the explosion, and we made it worse._

“Akira,” Morgana said as soon as he saw Akira’s expression. “what happened?”

Akira shifted his gaze. “Ryuji’s in the hospital.” He was barely able to say, mostly whispered, biting his lip.

Morgana gasped. After a minute of tense silence, Akira kicked his legs off the bed, almost sending Morgana flying. “Hey!!” Akira ignored him, attempting to open the chat while getting dressed.

**Group Chat**

TheJoker: everyone up.

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

TheJoker: now

LesbiAnn: okay!

LesbiAnn: I’m up!

ClassPrez: Why are you texting us at 2:37 in the f***ing morning!

Memejed: whoa, cranky makoto ＼(º □ º l|l)/

Memejed: but I’m with her (－_－) zzZ

ClassPrez: I AM ONLY CALM BECAUSE I’M NOT TIRED THEN

Picasso: I was working on my new piece! This must have a very important meaning!

LesbiAnn: why are you working this early?

Picasso: Art comes before sleep!

Memejed: (」°ロ°)」

Memejed: You are going to regret this one day

Memejed: I’m sure of it (⇀‸↼‶)

VenusFlyTrap: im sure Akira-kun does have a very important reason to wake us up!

TheJoker: Hospital.

Memejed: wat?

TheJoker: sorry, in a rush.

TheJoker: Ryuji is in the hospital.

TheJoker: I don’t know why, I just got a call from his aunt

VenusFlyTrap: I will meet you there

Picasso: This is a very good reason. I will make haste there.

Memejed: I’ll tell Sojiro where we’re going

Memejed: lets go together Akira

LesbiAnn: I’ll meet you there too

ClassPrez: I’m sorry for losing my cool

ClassPrez: This is indeed very important

ClassPrez: I’ll go as fast as I can

TheJoker: see you all there


	2. Oenomaus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Thieves learn the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am bored, so this came earlier than expected.

“Sorry I took so long!!” Ann yelled. “It’s fine. There isn’t much of a rush.” Akira replied solemnly. He is not in any rush to see how badly Ryuji is hurt.

“On the contrary, Akira. I wanted to see my lover as soon as humanly possible.” Yusuke huffed, fidgeting with his shirt, and shooting some hardcore death glares at the hospital. As if he resented the place itself.

Akira did in a way as well. 

“Well I did get some gifts for Ryuji. To make him feel better, whatever happened.” Ann reminded the boys of her presence again, presenting her bag. “Just some uncooked ramen, manga, that kinda stuff.” Ann gave a strained smile, trying to lighten the mood.

“Can we just go? All this build up is making me nervous!!” Futaba complained, pulling on Akira’s sleeve. Makoto and Haru where already going before anyone could respond.

Akira was lagging behind the group though, a few steps behind Futaba.

“Joker, are you okay?” Morgana asked, before being shoved back down. “Keep down. You look like a cat, Morgana, like it or not. Cats aren’t allowed here.” Akira spat, with bitterness in his voice. Morgana felt the tension coming from Joker, Akira.

As the thieves passed through the doors, Yusuke spied for Ryuji’s mom, who agreed she would meet them here. “There she is.” Yusuke pointed at a woman with dark brown hair came up to them. It was Kasumi Sakamoto, who looked like a mess. Hair messy, coming out of her ponytail, wearing a sloppily put together outfit.

“Greetings. Sorry for calling so early in the morning.” Kasumi apologized, voice tired and drained. “But Ryu-kun is in bad shape, I’ll explain more in the room.” She finished quietly. The young woman beckoned for them to follow her, which they obliged. It was eerie, hearing voices in rooms and beeping from others. 

When they got there, Kasumi opened the door, showing a horrible sight.

Ryuji was unconscious, hooked up to machines and tubes. Another woman with black hair and maroon eyes was weeping next to the bed.

Ann and Yusuke practically teleported to the bed. 

Everyone close behind. Ann looked over Ryuji, worried, Yusuke sat by his side, Haru went over to the lady in the room, hugging and consoling her, Makoto was starting to talk to the woman as well, Futaba was behind Akira, having bad memories of the hospital, and Akira just stood by the foot of the bed, emotionless.  
“Haru,” Makoto started, “this may be rude to say, but how do you this woman?” Haru looked back at Makoto, “sorry, this is Hana Sakamoto. I met her at the gardening shop, and she’s Ryuji’s aunt.” Makoto nodded.

“What happened to Ryuji?” Ann asked Kasumi, nervously, who simply sat down on a chair in the corner of the room.

“I found Ryuji at home, and,” she took a deep breath. “He had a stab wound in his stomach, the doctors said that a lung and three ribs where also fractured, as well as a broken hand and burn marks on his back.” She looked down from the shocked faces.

“I don’t know about the broken ribs, hand and burn marks, but the doctors said he must’ve fell. The stab wounds however, the doctors think this was a,” she gulped. They knew what she is going to say, but didn’t want to hear it. “Suicide attempt.”

Tears fell from her eyes, putting her face in her hands.

Yusuke moved, shakily, to her and hugged Kasumi, small tears nesting in his eyes. 

“ryuji..” Ann whispered. “i had no idea.”

Haru simply hugged Hana, who hugged back at Haru. 

Makoto sat down, processing.

Futaba is squeezing Akira arm now, especially at the word ‘suicide’. 

And Akira, was ashamed. Akira had thought Ryuji had problems, but that they were this big and he never knew about them, was shameful. 

Morgana wanted to come out of the bag, but he knew he couldn’t, so he mentally slapped himself instead. He was the hardest on Ryuji, for awhile, but the reactions he got he saw in a new light. Him and Ryui seemed to have a lot more in common than he thought.

Morgana got angry to prove to himself as well as everyone that he was good, useful, and he got sympathy. Ryuji did the same all the time, and all he got was a passing, ‘where just messing with you.’

Everyone else had the same thought.

And what Ryuji said to Akira earlier made too much sense.

 

_Akira was in the bathroom, when he got a call._

_“Hey man.” Ryuji’s voice was calm, but lifeless._

_“Hey.”_

_“Sorry if I called you at a bad time. But I got a favour to ask. Please just listen.” Akira should’ve thought this was odd, but thought nothing of it at the time._

_“Sure.”_

_“Akira, if, I happen to leave suddenly, promise me you’ll take care of Yusuke? I, just thought of this because of what happened today, I just want to make sure that he’ll be okay.”_

_For some odd reason again, Akira thought Ryuji wasn’t obviously lying._

_“I promise I will.”_

_“Thanks man. You’ll be a life saver.”_

_Ryuji hung up._

_*Ryuji is offline.*_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You wanted to know the truth.
> 
> Here, have some fan tears. ┬┴┬┴┤･ω･)ﾉ
> 
> Edit: Okay so, the title for this chapter is based on a person from a myth. Oenomaus was a king, blah blah blah, his chariot was sabitoged for a race, the pins in his wheels were replaced with beeswax. The next day, in the race, the wax pins in the wheels melts and the wheels flew off the chariot, killing Oenomaus.
> 
> (foreshadowing)


	3. An Emporer's worry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yusuke has regrets, and something cool happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here it is in all it's horrible glory. I can't write characters.

_Yusuke opened his eyes, revealing a light sky, then a friendly face came into his view. No, not just friendly, beautiful, his lovers face, Ryuji. Yusuke, for just a moment, appreciated all the light and love on his face._

_“Hey babe! About time you woke up!” Ryuji said sweetly, and he smiled so wide that it must have hurt._

_“Ryuji…” Yusuke shifted, noticing that he was resting in Ryuji’s lap. Turning his head to the side, looking at the mountains and trees in front of him, and the lake in front of it all. It was like a painting you’d see in a museum, but what Yusuke saw when he looked up was more beautiful than any painting could portray._

_“Ryu….” Yusuke sat up and hugged so passionately, it toppled them both over onto the ground. “Whoa!! Babe? Are you okay?” Ryuji questioned, putting his hand on Yusuke’s back._

_“Ryuji, I had a terrible nightmare. Y-you were… and, i-i-it was… I…” Yusuke sobbed into Ryuji. He felt Ryuji’s hand start to rub circles into his back. “Its okay, ’m here, and its only a dream.” He cooed into Yusuke’s ear “I won’t leave you.”_

_Yusuke calmed down, and looked up, wanting to see Ryuji’s beautiful face once more, only to see nothing. The world was darker suddenly, and Yusuke scrambled to his feet. He looked in every direction, looking for some trace of Ryuji, but saw nothing._

_The sky was red, but Yusuke barely noticed._

_“Ryuji?” He called. “Ryuji?! If this is one of those ‘pranks’ this is not funny and come out!!” He was growing more and more panicky, the wind was picking up and the water was raging. Yusuke screamed to the heavens to see if he was here but,_

_“RYUJI?!!”_

_Nobody came to his calls._

Yusuke woke up quickly, panting and sweating. Looking around the room his vision had to adjust before seeing that this wasn’t his dorm room, Oh, right. He was at Ryujis hospital bedside. Yusuke pinched himself to see if his mind was still trying to torture him, only to have a small pinch of normal pain instead of waking up again.

This was the fourth night of nightmares. Yusuke looked around the dark room, to absolutely make sure this wasn’t another nightmare. Nothing changed, everything was normal. 

_So this isn’t a dream._

Yusuke was not alone in the room, Akira is in the chair, Ann is sleeping right side up, and Morgana is purring in his sleep next to Ann, but it feels like he’s alone, the only one awake next to the blond, waiting for him to wake up.

Yusuke looked at the unconscious Ryuji, and he looks strangely peaceful. Like he’s miles away from all his problems, which is probably what he wanted in the end, as morbid as it sounds. Ryuji wanted to escape his bad situation, bad luck, and terrifying mental state.

Yusuke knew Ryuji’s mental state is far from healthy, he did let himself get walked over, literally sometimes. Yusuke just didn’t know how to address it to him. 

_He should have then. Should have been supportive._

Yusuke clenched his hand, mad at himself. He never had a easy time getting social cues, but he was bashed over the head with them that night.

Yusuke remembered looking back, and seeing Ryuji’s face. He should have seen that Ryuji was not looking at them with spite, but with heartbreak. 

Yusuke was not one to bash down too much on himself, but he had too.

He did hurt the person who genuinely loved him, or at least a crushed on Yusuke so much a relationship came from it.

The artist buried his face in his arms, overcome with shame he held ever since he saw Ryuji here.

Then, Yusuke felt a small shift in the sheets. Looking up slightly, he sees dark brown slits through his eyelids.

Gasping, he got up, knocking over his chair, and held Ryuji’s hand.

“w..where?” Ryuji mumbled, looking over at Yusuke. “Yusuke…wha…” A small glimpse of fear struck his face, why would he be scared of…….oh. Right. Last time he remembered Yusuke, he had abandoned Ryuji on a street light.

“Ryuji, you’re safe. I’m not mad.” Yusuke smiled, and tried to comfort. He was so relieved, worried, and just, happy Ryuji was awake.

However, Ryuji was struggling to keep his eyes open, “i…..m’ sor….sorry.” As Ryuji finished his words, Yusuke thought he saw, something. And just as suddenly as he woke up, Ryuji passed out.

Yusuke was stunned. What happened? Ryuji wasn’t supposed to be awake for at least a week, probably two. Any other emotion he might have had is covered with a thick layer of worry.

“ugh….what is the commotion about?” Groaned Akira’s voice. Yusuke looked over his shoulder, and Akira was waking up, probably by Yusuke’s loud speaking.

Akira, groaned again, and stretched in his chair. He took one look at how shocked Yusuke is, and “What happened?”

Yusuke was still confused, but managed to say despite this,

“Ryuji woke up, for a minute.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spooky.
> 
> I wonder what will happen. nah I don't wonder, I'm the writer, I can make them all turn into bunnies if I want to. But NO SPOILERS. Sorry! ─=≡Σ((( つ＞＜)つ


	4. The Dogs Without An Owner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dogs sworm the streets, and Akira gets an odd text from Yusuke.

Karma knows no bounds.

After the teens reported that Ryuji woke up so soon, they got thrown out to see if he is stable, but Akira thinks part of it was because they brought Morgana along.

Now, Akira is in school. School has never bothered him, but now it’s torture. School only inches by, and Akira can feel every second. The best part is when the bell goes and he can escape with the others to do something. 

Recently it’s been visiting the hospital a lot, but they still carry on with their lives. Though it would be a lie to say that they have the same energy and happiness from when they went out to dinner, on the incident night. 

Akira never misses the dull expressions, or the quiet that easily falls over them at meetings. 

Akira looked out the window and thinks, long and hard about these things every day. One question still rings in his mind though. Why exactly did Ryuji—

Ann shook his shoulder. “Helllooo?” She questioned.

“Hm?” Akira looked up, and, oh. Everyone was leaving. School must’ve ended. Opening up his bag so Morgana could jump in, he stood up and speed walked out of class. 

The second Akira walked out of the school, his phone started going off. Taking it out, he started walking to the station while reading.

**Group Chat**

**Memejed** : hey guys (´• ω •`)ﾉ

 **Memejed** : i found this online

 **Memejed** : (a picture of a street swarmed by dogs)

 **TheJoker** : why are there so many dogs?!

 **LesbiAnn** : holy shit!!

 **ClassPrez** : where did so many dogs come from?!

 **VenusFlyTrap** : oh those poor things! They look hungry! 

**Memejed** : I have no answers to any of those ┐(￣ヘ￣;)┌

 **Picasso** : I had no idea there were so many stray dogs

 **LesbiAnn** : i have never seen so many dogs anywhere!

 **LesbiAnn** : where did they come from?

 **TheJoker** : maybe they got kicked out of where they usually stay?

 **ClassPrez** : But wouldn’t that be in a newspaper or something?

 **Picasso** : I think I have a theory

 **Picasso** : Skull used to feed and pet dogs whenever I visited him, and because he is no longer available, they are trying to find food.

Akira was at the train station, waiting for his train obviously, pressing his lips together tightly. Yusuke started using the name Skull when referring to Ryuji, no one completely understood, but let him.

Akira blinked, his train had arrived, and was leaving. He zoned out for too long. Dammit. Sighing, he shifted his gaze back.

 **LesbiAnn** : Awww!! That is so sad!

 **VenusFlyTrap** : I had no idea there were so many poor stray dogs!!

 **Picasso** : It really is a shame

The chat bubbled out after that, so Akira pocketed his phone while getting on the train. 

Today the train was extra packed, and Akira was squished against the door. Everyone around him was talking about the Phantom Thieves and their giant video calling card. Akira cared very little though.

Akira had been feeling, empty, recently. Like his guts had been scooped out and whoever did it had done nothing to fill the cavity in the raven haired student. He dully stared out the window he was squished against.

It felt like the train ride was only a minute, and Akira unthinkingly went to LeBlanc. He had also been ignoring doing things he thought as ‘fun.’

It wasn’t like Mona was letting this happen either, but he would disappear for hours, usually before school and coming back in the evening. Akira didn’t mind this. He was empty, of coarse he is not the best person to be around.

His phone buzzed. Akira was now on his bed. It was like he was on autopilot until now.

Looking down, he expected it to be from the main chat but it wasn’t, it was ‘Picasso’ (Yusuke). 

**Picasso** : Akira, I would like to discuss something with you. 

**Picasso** : please, it’s urgent Akira.

The second text was slightly odd, but Akira shrugged it off. Yusuke must’ve written it very quickly.

 **TheJoker** : what is it?

 **Picasso** : I would like to discuss this in person if possible. 

**TheJoker** : why?

 **Picasso** : Just expect me to come to LeBlanc this evening. 

Akira lifted his eyebrow in curiosity. Yusuke was acting odd. This really must be urgent.

 **TheJoker** : alright.

————————————-

Yusuke entered the cafe with no hesitation, immediately spotting Akira behind the counter with his apron and smile on.

“Hey Yusuke, Boss went out for groceries for a bit.” Akira stated. “We have the place to ourselves for this ‘discussion.’” Akira’s face straitened out.

Yusuke nodded. “Good.” The blue haired student came up to counter and sat down carefully, nervous at what he is going to say. “I’ll get to the point.” Yusuke gritted out in a iron hard tone.

 

“I believe Ryuji Sakamoto has a palace.”

Akiras eyes widened in shock.

“What?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR HOW LONG THIS TOOK AHHHHHHHHHH ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д<)*ﾟﾟ･｡

**Author's Note:**

> okay. so. it's a mess. I know. I have a hard time characterizing characters, especially Akira and Morgana. So this has not a lot of Morgana because of that. I also suck at writing.
> 
> This will be updated not soon at all. not like people like this mess. Or, Who knows? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


End file.
